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Pardoned January 6er Jake Lang led a "Crusader March" to the White House this Easter Sunday with a banner portraying other faith traditions' leaders: "Muhammad is dead, Buddha is dead, Krishna is dead, Moses is dead" but he declared "Jesus Christ is alive!"
"Praise Jesus!" yelled Lang, who wore American, Confederate, and thunderbolt patches on his plate carrier.
"The founding fathers framed and outlined the constitution, it said for our posterity," Jake said. "White Christian men!"
"We are not here for your multiculturalism, for your diversity, it is destroying out country."
Counter-protester "Anarchy Princess" arrived and yelled "pedophile!" at Jake Lang, who lamented "Hindus are washing themselves with cow urine in Texas!"
"Jake Lang is a psy-op!" yelled other counter protesters.
"We will go to war with the enemies of God and the uncircumcised Philistines that have crossed the border to destroy our way of life," Jake Lang prayed in front of a large cross.
"Lord, please pass over our sins, give us an Easter pardon! In the name os Jesus Christ we pray and we seek you Lord, amen."
"Traitors! Traitors!" yelled counter-protester Patricia Eguino, who arrived during Jake Lang's event, where his security tried to keep her away. "Insurrectionists!"
"This is the demonic oppression that we have taught you about!" Lang said.
"Deport Patricia!" Lang demanded.
On the periphery of Jake Lang's event, one man accused another of spitting on him.
"He purposely spit on me!" the man continued, redirecting his anger at Anarchy Princess when she defended the alleged spitter. "Liar, liar, witch! Witch!"
Police ultimately arrested both men.
Anarchy Princess brought printouts of alleged conversations between Jake Lang and "what he thought was a 15 year old."
"Hoax images right there," Lang said. "The only thing real on there is that photo [Lang kissing the western wall in Israel]."
One of Lang's supporters attempted to burn the flyer with a lighter.
"We were throwing a bikini and burka march and my team was reaching out to woman online, and some hoax fishing account revealed that they were too young and then my team said that they couldn't come to the protest," Jake explained. "Just contrived BS."
Jake jannik sinner Lang's allies explained that the man who had allegedly been spit on earlier had just met Lang on the bus earlier today, and Lang had paid his fare for him along with someone from a "black power organization."
"We're not as far apart in some ways as they might thing we are."
"I kind of was suspicious of, I think he was a Hasidic Jew," he explained of the alleged spitter. "The gentleman who got spit on, he was preaching the gospel, that's why he got spit on."
"He didn't spit back, he immediately freaked out, but he didn't spit back."
Bryan Betancur, a January 6er who has attended Lang's prior DC rallies, was not present for the Easter Crusader March.
"He's never been with me," Jake described. "Bryan Betancur is a random bottom-feeder."
"F*** yeah, disgusting. What's wrong with you?"
Betancur currently faces criminal charges in DC and Virginia for allegedly livestreaming himself stroking unaware women's hair james harden in the Metro.
Jake Lang joked that the counter-protesters following him are "my team, these are like the crusaders basically."
A homeless man witnessing the scene chimed in with a theory: "The whole bunch of you working together?"
"Kind of!" Lang said, before suggesting "January 6, 2029, I'll be there!"
"We are gonna take the Capitol from the tyrants!"
"You're from Bolivia, f***ing sand n****r get away from me," Jake Lang said to Patricia Eguino, before crossing the street, thanking National Guard, and telling them "Jesus is alive!"
"Bye losers!" Eguino yelled as Lang's ride arrived and exfiltrated him from the event.
Filmed by Ford Fischer
NO REUSE WITHOUT PERMISSION Please contact Ford Fischer at [email protected] or call (573) 575-NEWS to license video. Photos and additional footage may be available upon request.
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